I was at a party once when the most beautiful woman walked in.

At first, my eyes followed her like an eager student. I wanted to study her moves, her makeup, her dress. Maybe I could learn to be more like her. But within moments, I began to feel confused. I noticed her cloud of judgment as she looked at others, the smirk on her face, and her lack of joy. Slowly but surely my infatuation with her beauty evaporated.

How can someone be so beautiful and so poisonous at the same time?

I could hear another woman laughing in the other room. As I made my way through the crowd, I could actually “feel” her energy!

She was glowing and had an infectious smile. It seemed that every man and woman wanted to be close to her to catch a glimpse and get in on the conversation. She was captivating in every way. I took a moment to study her. "Ohhhh she is so beautiful," I caught myself thinking. I watched from afar.

Then to my surprise, I caught myself taking her apart to understand what made her so beautiful. Her clothing was nice, but not nearly the designer apparel that the first woman had. Her hair and makeup groomed, but nothing that special.

It was her smile.

It was her energy.

She radiated an aura that was like a magnet drawing me closer. When she made eye contact, it felt like she really SAW me. She listened and was engaging. I totally expected her to turn into snow white with bluebirds tweeting all around her.

Confidence is alluring. Confidence is sexy. Confidence is a mindset. 


"i am confident"
metabolism booster to
"i am centered"
to fight off the aging effects of stress, YOUR SAVING GRACE

I have discovered that getting RID of some things that hold back your inner Goddess is the first step to lighting that sexy fire once again!

Here are three things to get rid of, and three things to add to bring back your FIERCENESS!


1) Get Rid Of The Critic

You know, the one who sits on your shoulder and whispers in your ear, “You are gonna do what?!!! Who do you think you are? You aren’t pretty enough. You are too fat. You’re too old to wear that. Your belly pokes out. Your legs are crinkly. You should cover up at your age.” Send the critic packing!!! Knock the crap out of that voice.

Have you ever looked at a photo from 5 or 10 years ago?

You likely think, "Wow, I looked good back then!!! I looked hot in that swimsuit!" 

Yet, back then, you may have been like me and thought you looked too fat, too skinny, too whatever!!!!
I found myself wishing that I would have strutted more!
I wish I would have realized how awesome I looked!!
Has this ever happened to you?!!

Guess what?!!
You look great NOW!!!

Pull out that outfit in your closet that makes you feel like a million bucks!!


10 years from now you will look at that photo and think, wow!! I did look amazing. Isn't it crazy the way the “critic” nitpicks our every flaw and plays with our confidence???
It simply isn’t true!!!


2) GET RID OF THE FRENEMY -  (friend/enemy- it's a real term!)

Oh yes, we all have had these. The friend who pretends to advise you keeps your best interest at heart. You will find the advice seems to always be the kind that limits your light. They may talk behind your back, enjoy gossip, always have drama, and they never really celebrate YOU. You may actually feel like they are competing with you at times. Get rid of the frenemy!!!

Surround yourself with friends that push you to be seen. Friends that encourage you to shine in all your glory, to have fun, to date, and taste life fully!! Friends that lift you up and praise you to your face AND to anyone that asks about you.



Anyone who is toxic even if it's your significant other. If you read my book, “The Confidence Cure” you will read a little about my abusive past. It took a lot of courage and patience to get out safely. Now I can see clearly and I am wasting no part of my life.

“Life becomes easier when you delete toxic people from your life.”

Now, here are three things to ADD
to ignite your inner Goddess!



Every morning and every evening say positive things to yourself. Stand in front of the mirror and PRAISE your body, your beautiful skin, this amazing masterpiece called the human body that carries you around daily, Your strong, beating heart that pumps up to 100 times per minute! Your intelligent mind that thinks 60,000-80,000 thoughts per day!! The light that shines within you, the energy that people can FEEL when you enter the room. Appreciate the most intelligent being on earth, YOU.

Value yourself and then others will value you. You must value yourself first then others will value you as well. We teach people how to treat us. It starts with how are YOU treating yourself. Affirmations are the foundation of this change.



Consult with a fashion expert. Some stores offer free clothing stylists. Take advantage of these services! Don’t have the extra cash? Invite a friend who has a certain flair for fashion, ask her to see you in a different way, and help you find your inner Goddess. Sometimes a different perception is quite helpful and fun! Think outside the box. How about a closet switch with your girlfriend or even a trip to the vintage store! Great bargains and so much fun!


3) New Beauty Boost  

Doesn't it feel wonderful to get a new sexy haircut or color? A new shade of lipstick, a hot pair of high heels, flirty hoop earrings? Whatever gets you into your alter ego, do it! Never tried red lips? Try it!!! If it looks bad it's as easy as wiping it off! Be willing to experiment with something different! Get playful!

What do you think would be great to ADD to your life to reignite your inner Goddess?

Join the conversation. Follow us on Instagram and Facebook for weekly inspiration!

Lastly, you know at Confidence by Char we believe in the power of “i am”
My gift to you this month is the following script of powerful affirmations to ignite your inner Goddess and become devilishly sexy!

This month’s affirmations:

I am valuable.

There is no one that even compares to me.

I am unique,

Light beams from within me and around me.
Even in silence, my presence is felt.

I am light-
a magnet for good in my life.

I am a magnet-
drawing people in.

I am captivating,

I am intelligent-
My words have an impact and I inspire others.
When I speak people listen because what I say matters

Look how beautiful I am:
My skin is radiant,
My eyes are clear,
My heart is warm.

I care deeply about myself.
I take care of this valuable body making it stronger, leaner, faster, more fit daily.
I know the better I take care of myself, the better I can care for others.

I freely and enthusiastically give myself the very best care,
I take time to nurture my skin.
I take time to nurture my body.

I am valuable
I am a masterpiece.
I am a Goddess.

I have a fire inside of me that burns with passion.
I am a hot tamale!
A fricken delight!

A Devilishly Sexy Woman whose fire has just begun.

I am not finished yet.

I have just begun.

See me.

For more valuable insights on creating a CONFIDENT, YOUTHFUL BODY, read my international bestselling book, “The Confidence Cure”!

Order your copy today!